When I first read that people were calling 911 over a house’s Halloween decorations, I expected an X-rated front yard tableau of a kinky demon orgy. Lots of chains, spiked dildos, and blood-curdling screams, which would obviously have fuddy-duddy neighbors clutching their pearls and hiding their innocent children’s eyes. Alas, the Riverside, California home sparking all this controversy is actually a Pirates of the Caribbean-themed display that looks like a house fire. So people are calling 911 to report a “FIRE! FIRE! FIIIIIRE!”